Being engaged is undervalued these days. When did the idea of making a lifelong commitment based off a short term relationship become the norm? The average engagement in America is 14 months, that is right over one year. Yet, in the Christian community, that is considered a “lifetime” of waiting for the “obvious” to happen. Nearly a third of engagements are ended before the wedding day and the divorce rate scary high for remarriages. So again we ask, what is the rush?
Engagement is not a void time before the wedding day. It should be filled with intimate moments of sharing and growing spiritually together. Once the ring is on the finger, there is no questions from the other person or those around you what your intentions are. So rather than talking about “someday” you get the opportunity to talk about reality.
Dating always has some side to it of being our better self, being engaged is the first chance to start letting down all your guards and being completely committed to someone else knowing they share that same level of commitment. That said, it’s not marriage. Emotionally and spiritually you should be growing closer daily to one another, but physical intimacy should wait until the wedding day. That’s where the line is drawn between being engaged and marriage.
Being engaged is not being married, so it is still a time of transition for things to come, but also a time where a person can leave a relationship before committing to something more. If you are going to marry, be engaged and use that time to grow as a couple to verify the commitment of marriage.