This question is one we get from time-to-time at Table for One Ministries. Usually backed up by Matthew 7:7. Ask, seek, and knock, and it will be given to you. So, is it okay to pray for a spouse?
One summer’s day the sun was beating down on the Texas earth and a single adult was out playing ultimate frisbee with some friends. Hot as it was, it was nice to be outside with friends and meeting new people. In the middle of the game at the height of a tied game, he said, “I wish I was married.” Not even knowing where the emotion came from, it was tossed aside and focus went back on the game.
In the evening as these friends gathered for prayer time, the verbal statement overwhelmed the discussion and the prayer list. When it happened, the group prayed for spouses.
It is not a problem to pray for a spouse, in fact there are verses like Matthew 7:7, James 1:1-9, and Psalm 21:2 that encourage this. Here is the defining emotion in this type of prayer request:
Are you praying for a spouse to be complete, or for the “icing on the top” in life?
What we mean is, a spouse is nothing you need to be complete. The Apostle Paul and Jesus were very good examples of that! It is merely the little extra something that life has to offer in one aspect of your life.
For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, and in Christ you have been brought to fullness. He is the head over every power and authority. Colossians 2:9-10
For this group, the response was clear. Although they found completeness in Christ they wanted to be married. And, although marriage would not define them, they still voiced the desire to be married.
This one spoken desire grew into a well-defined group prayer until the day God divinely placed potential spouses in the lives of this group of friends.
This was years in the making, not just one simple prayer. So yes, pray for a spouse if the Lord has led you to be married, but live a life that is Complete in Christ so that He will receive the glory in all things you do.
So, do you pray for a spouse?