Introduction: A Seat at the Real Table
Imagine being invited to a feast, only to be escorted to a folding table in the corner with plastic cups and leftover décor. Too often, this is how single adults feel in church spaces — welcomed, but not fully included. They may be offered a ministry “table,” but it’s often separated, minimized, or temporary.
Yet in America, more than 53% of adults are single, and only 23% of churchgoers are single. If your church isn’t reaching single adults intentionally, you’re likely missing half your mission field.
1. The Problem: A Ministry Mindset Stuck in the Past
Many churches have unintentionally created environments where singleness is treated like a temporary condition to be fixed or a waiting room for marriage. Ministries may label groups as “college and career,” “young professionals,” or “divorce care,” but few use the word “single” openly — and even fewer treat singleness as a valid, full life stage.
This stigma often results in singles being left out of leadership roles, family-focused events, or discipleship pipelines. The assumption? Marriage is the spiritual finish line.
But Scripture tells another story.
The Apostle Paul, a single adult, says, “I wish that all were as I myself am” (1 Corinthians 7:7). Jesus, our Savior, was single and perfectly complete. Singleness is not a problem to be solved — it’s a platform for Gospel-centered impact.
2. The Solution: Build Single-Inclusive Community, Not Just Programs
At Table for One Ministries, we affirm that being complete in Christ (Colossians 2:10) is the foundation for all believers, regardless of relationship status. Single adults aren’t a stepping stone to marriage ministry — they are disciples, leaders, mentors, and laborers in the harvest.
To shift from the “kids’ table” mindset, churches must:
- Recognize every life stage of singleness — including never married, dating, engaged, divorced, single parents, and widows.
- Equip singles for disciple-making roles, not just social events.
- Use accurate language — say “single,” not just “young professionals” or “season of life.”
- Create mixed settings where single and married adults do life together — worshipping, serving, and learning side-by-side.
3. The Stats Don’t Lie: Singles Are the Majority, But Not in Church
- 62% of singles have never been married.
- 40% of all families are led by single parents.
- The median age of first marriage is 30 for men and 28 for women.
- Yet only 23% of church attendees are single — revealing a massive gap between the community and the church.
These numbers highlight a crucial truth: not reaching singles = not reaching your community.
4. A Biblical and Missional Approach to Singleness
God’s Word never defines maturity by marital status. Spiritual growth, calling, and purpose are rooted in Christ, not a ring. Your church can disciple singles with the same intentionality as any other group — with Scripture as the center and community as the context.
Paul, Timothy, Lydia, and even Jesus all served in singleness. To ignore singles today is to overlook a huge part of the Body of Christ. Your church can reflect the diversity of the Kingdom by welcoming singles fully to the table — not a kids’ table, but Christ’s table.
5. Practical Next Steps for Churches
- Audit your ministry language and structure. Is it family-centric or Kingdom-centric?
- Host a Singles-Focused Sunday using the Complete in Christ Catalytic Event.
- Launch a small group using the 6-Week Embrace the Table study.
- Survey your church to determine how many singles are attending.
- Train leaders to see single adults as future deacons, mentors, and disciple-makers.
Conclusion: Everyone Deserves a Seat at the Table
When single adults are treated as full members of the Body of Christ, the church flourishes. It’s time to dismantle the “kids’ table” and replace it with the truth that all believers — single or married — are complete in Christ.
Let your church be a place where single adults no longer feel like they’re waiting for something more, but are empowered to live fully for Christ now.
