What do I do once know I am Gay?
Being a singles leader does not mean you are in charge of the dating relationships for all who walk into your group. It is, in fact, the opposite of that. You are there to help be a leader they can turn to as they grow in their relationship with the Lord. You are the ear they should be able to come to without judgment or resentment, while still being the place to hear the truth is God’s Word.
So imagine being the leader when a guy in the group comes to you says, “I’m Gay and love God. What do I do next?” With over 25 million people in America who struggle with same-sex attraction or are openly engaged in it, the question is not if this will happen in your singles group, but when. How will you react, what advice will you give?
God is love. Your reaction should be loving as well. This person is not asking for you to explain in Scripture where it says same-sex attraction is wrong. They know that and they love God, which is why they are asking “now what?” We believe your response needs to include the following:
We are all sinners. Your sin is not “special.” All fall short of the Glory of God. Being attracted to the same-sex does not mean you have to act on it. In the same way heterosexuals do not date or have relationships, you can too. It’s a choice to engage in those relationships, regardless of the debate of where those feelings come from. No sin is so big that it can not be overcome. You can have victory over this struggle like other struggles we all have. The point to remember is to define that victory–it does not mean having a heterosexual marriage and kids! It is having a relationship with Christ first!!!
As a leader, you need to be ready to respond and give options to your singles who struggle with same-sex attraction. Remember, the end goal is for us to become more like Christ, who was single, and reflect His image. Rather than condemn, let’s move people closer to God so that He may be glorified in all that we do.
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